“The Cowboy’s Turtle Association” (2025) by Rachel Sumner

Boston’s seen a few rodeos - I should know - I was in ‘em
The last of the shows that would still allow bronc-riding women
Seeing as my stock-in-trade was in roughstock events
I’d go where I could, and I’d win where I went

Colonel WT Johnson’s round-up was a national treasure
Brought the best steer and steed for the crowd and the cowboy’s pleasure 
He’d sell every seat and put us on parade
Down the cobblestone streets, yelling yippee-kai-yay

Saying “it’s worth every buck, kid! It’s worth every buck!”

God, how we thrilled the children who filled up the stands
Surprise in their eyes and noses pressed to the fence!
And when gals took a spill, Johnson covered the cost
Still you can’t trust a boss who’s thoughts are on profit and loss 

It’s worth every buck though, it’s worth every buck

Cowboys aren’t paid….we pony up if we wanna compete
But the purse didn’t equal the sum of all our entry fees
Johnson was skimming the cream off the top–
We knew then and there, that the buck had to stop

Take out the big dog, and pups fall in line
We started conspiring in ‘35
Spent a year counting cowboys we could be sure of
Gotta stir up some boots to keep boots out of stirrups

61 of us signed on the line and delivered the blow
Just two days before the World Championship Rodeo:
”Dear Colonel you’ll do well to meet our demands
Either double the purse or have a strike on your hands”

The boss wouldn’t budge, though we figured as much, so we mounted our horses and left
We posed for a photo, tipped our hats to the Colonel, then rode off into the sunset

Johnson made a big noise, told the boys in Illinois to come quick!
Rail it to Boston, help bail out the Championship
They responded in kind:

“We, the undersigned Cowboys at the Chicago Stadium do hereby agree not to go to the Boston Show, unless the demands of the Cowboys now at Boston are met. The boys in Boston must be allowed to work and not barred from that show.”

Scouring for scabs, Johnson paid stable hands to ride on
Two bones a ticket, but we wouldn’t miss them perform!
Those rodeo clowns with an ounce of our skill
Would trade their own ma for a ten-dollar bill

Saying “it’s worth every buck, pa, it’s worth every buck!”

So, we jeered at the cattlemen and sang “Empty Saddles” real loud
Screamed “Bring out the cowboys!” and riled the whole damn crowd
The rattled ol’ manager shut down the place
And left Colonel Johnson with egg on his face 

Management soon endorsed us, and Johnson was forced to accept all our stipulations
The cowboys had won; a union begun called The Turtle Association

So if sticking your neck out takes time, well I say just take it
The tortoise moves slow, but there’s never been any mistaking
Just what it is steadily heading toward
Many lives are improved when you’re of one accord

Before we had signed, picket lines were for tying up horses
And strikes were for umpires, and oil, and infantry forces
But we cowboys got wise, organized a solution 
Buddy, even John Wayne paid his dues to a union

It’s worth every buck! It’s worth every buck!
It’s worth every buck! It’s worth every buck!